Well, I wish I could tell you that yesterday’s reminder of the rules about internet in his home brought about an epiphany and awareness that he was putting our children at potential risk..but we are talking about an addict who has never embraced that awareness. So, needless to say, there was double speak about “it’s not really internet. I don’t have it all the time, just on demand.” Me “Is that because you hack into your neighbors?” Him “No, you don’t understand”
Oh no, believe me, I understand.
So, the readers digest version is that he used all his tricks to try to divert away from the truth. Minimizing, blame, distraction, circle talk, anger and finally defiance. Apparently he is choosing to keep his internet that isn’t internet because “the kids need it for school and that’s part of being a good parent.” He of course said he has changed and doesn’t need those rules anymore. “So, you never admitted you needed them before- now you acknowledge you did?” “I have changed and I don’t need those rules” “You have changed since our son saw porn on your phone? Has it been since then?” AGGH
I wish I could say I remained calm and never took the bait but I did ride the crazy train for a few stops with him.
Looks like I will be calling my attorney today to draft a letter. If he still refuses to comply, it’s back to court so they can tell him to comply and I can hand over $500-$1,000. SUPER. I will pop the popcorn and sit back and watch him try to explain how he has changed without treatment despite evidence to the contrary.
This week marks the 7th year since our divorce was final and these rules were put in place. And he hasn’t changed… Woot Woot..All ABOARD!!
Beyond His Porn Addiction 
“I will pop the popcorn and sit back and watch him try to explain how he has changed without treatment despite evidence to the contrary.” I think sometimes we have to just laugh as the crazy train goes by. It’s not funny by any means, but otherwise the sadness and anger will take over. They really are completely absurd.
I agree- the absurdity and predictability can be amusing at times. Less so when my children’s mental health is at stake, for sure. What I am really finding absurd is when I go back to my old pattern of trying to reason with him or “wake him up”.
The crazy train has pulled back into the station, but that doesn’t mean I need to hop on and rush to my old seat. I can just wave it on through. Practicing yoga is helping me find my center of calm while watching from the platform.